I personally believe that martial arts really doesn’t have anything to do with self-defense, fitness, or confidence—yes, you’ll get all of those, but they’re just a nice bonus. For me, martial arts is a spiritual journey, one that brings you into contact with yourself, others, and the way of the world.
A bit about my background before I share what I’ve learned over time. I started Judo at six years old in the Netherlands. After 10 years, I reached brown belt, with six years of competition and a certificate in submissions. I had to wait another two years for my black belt, but as a teenager, I cared more about big biceps back then—far out.
I did Sanda (Chinese kickboxing) for six years and taught basic kickboxing for about three years in the Netherlands.
During the three years I spent in the army, I also undertook self-defense training.
I started Jiu-Jitsu after moving to Australia, and I’ve now logged over five years in the art. I trained Systema for a year and a half with Craig from Tritan Martial Art, did Muay Thai off and on for about two and a half years with Eltham Martial Arts Academy and personal training from Nivo, and I’ve been studying Aikido for nearly two years under Aikido Shudokan. I’ve also run self-defense sessions for almost two years now, covering wrestling, grappling, striking, and weaponry.
Furthermore, I’ve completed a combative course with KEF, and attended several seminars with Paul Cale focusing on knife self-defense and wrist locks.
Before I dive into the principles, take what I say not as absolute statements, but as insights—an opportunity to think. I’m by no means a master, but I do tend to have a keen eye for patterns.
Move Yourself, Not Your Opponent
Moving yourself instead of your opponent can be understood in many ways, and it’s supported my journey towards self-discovery. In this context, take it literally.
This principle applies to all martial arts but becomes especially apparent in Aikido, which is all about shifting your center of gravity and projecting yourself. Don’t take this principle lightly—it has real depth. You need to feel the difference and have the experience before you can truly appreciate how profound this insight is.
The idea is to put yourself in the perfect position to apply force, maintaining your own center of gravity and projecting yourself forward through your body’s center, using your opponent as feedback but not as a directive for applying force.
In striking arts like Muay Thai, moving yourself—rather than just attacking the opponent—is also critical. You need to maintain the opportunity to respond, and losing your center of gravity by being off balance or forced to step back can easily cost you the fight.
In Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu, this also applies, especially in submissions. You’ll notice that people unaware of this principle tend to rely on their arms, while those who “move themselves” generate force and tension through their whole body.
Be Formless, Until It’s Too Late
Many martial artists know this principle well, though it goes by many names. Yet, I’ve seen many practitioners who lack awareness of its depth.
I discovered this through wrestling and grappling, but it applies to all martial arts. In simple terms: use tension sparingly. Tension not only fatigues you and inhibits force production, it also signals intent, letting your opponent sense where you are and what you’re doing just through touch.
Be like a snake: move slowly, position yourself just right so as not to alarm your target, and attack with complete ferocity, ending the fight instantly when within range.
In BJJ, you often have to rely on tactile feedback from your opponent. If they’re constantly tense, you can easily defend. But when you soften and move with the other person, you become almost invisible through formlessness.
Use Your Opponent’s Rhythm Against Them
It’s easy to understand rhythm in theory, but feeling your opponent’s cycles and using their weaknesses takes many hours of training. Understanding where rhythm comes from helps.
Everything in life goes through cycles. If you pay enough attention, you can sense what comes next—think seasons, day and night, etc. In your opponent, there are three key patterns: breathing, heartbeat, and nervous system adjustment.
I learned this during Judo competition. I could feel my opponent softening, and at the right moment, I’d sweep and attack.
So what should you look for? When people inhale, their body tenses and the spine extends—a period of increased focus. When exhaling, there’s a softening. But don’t attack when someone is exhaling; instead, respond just as they’re about to exhale, when a shift is about to happen—ideal for throwing someone off balance.
Heartbeat is more subtle. Peak contractions create focus; the refraction period creates softness. When stressed, the heart beats fast, so I wouldn’t use heart rhythm for takedowns, but it’s perfect for switching positions in wrestling or grappling.
I also like to use pressure just as someone exhales in grappling, to prevent them from fully exhaling. Done correctly, this is miserable for the opponent—use it only when the stakes are high.
The refraction period of the nervous system is a deep topic, but in brief: we have four phylogenetic states—fight, flight, flow, and freeze—and we cycle through these constantly. With practice, you can stimulate certain states and force a refraction period straight after, which, when capitalized on, can end the fight immediately.
Be Sturdy and Be Fluid at the Right Time
This principle was taught to me by a black belt at Australian Elite Team, after he completely wiped the floor with me during a grappling bout.
Know when to relax and let your opponent try to move you by gluing yourself to them. This makes you almost invisible and fatigues your opponent.
On the other hand, know when to inhibit movement by angling yourself correctly and tensing at the right moment. Do this the right way and you’ll completely dissuade your opponent from moving in certain areas, slowly guiding them down your chosen path.
Webbing Your Techniques
This principle was taught to me by Ninos Dammo, owner of Australian Elite Team. He said you shouldn’t chase techniques, but instead “web” techniques together, using whatever your opponent gives you against them.
Use Fear to Force a Response
This principle was incredibly successful during my Judo days. When competing in pools of about six competitors, the first thing you’d do is size everyone up.
In the first round, I’d try to be docile and soft, aiming to get to the floor without losing points. Next, I’d let my opponent get confident, maybe even give them a favorable position, and at the right time, I’d explode and completely overthrow my opponent. This caused fear in all the others, something I would capitalize on.
I distinctly remember one match where I used this on an opponent, scaring the next competitor. The kid nearly teared up and rushed me. All I did was shift my weight, sweep him, and that was it—game over.
Have people underestimate you. Be unpredictable. When someone realizes their mistake, capitalize and end the fight immediately. Don’t celebrate; remain unaffected.
The Way of the Normal Mind
This principle is a recent one, learned from Miyamoto Musashi. It is the way of the normal mind—not being attached to anything, as attachment causes emotion and a loss of presence.
Have no expectation, and focus on whatever is in front of you. Trying to empty your mind will do the opposite: it creates resistance and frustration. Remember, you are not your mind.
The Right Speed of Attack is to Blend With Your Opponent
I also learned this from Miyamoto Musashi, and it became clear through my Aikido practice—to be like a mirror and blend with your opponent. There’s a deep philosophical aspect to this, but let’s stick to the practical.
When to move and how fast you should move depends on 1) your intent, and 2) where your opponent is going. Your aim is to end the fight with as little unnecessary damage as possible, while timing your movement with your opponent’s shifting weight and applied force.
Apply Pain to Overrule the Rational Mind
Nobody likes pain, and interestingly, the sympathetic nervous system (your stress response) innervates the spine before the parasympathetic nervous system (rest). This means that using pain and discomfort can force a submission without your opponent even noticing. Overcoming this requires rigorous training.
I used this a lot in Judo—the aim being to make laying still and submitting as desirable as possible. Whenever my opponent fought back, I’d apply immediate pain, and stop when they gave up. A great way to do this is applying pressure to the ribs with your elbow, which leads to an instant retreat by your opponent.
Lock the Spine and Joints to Inhibit Ranges
This principle is straightforward: to control your opponent, lock areas like the hands/wrists, face/neck, ankles/knees/hips. It’s nearly impossible to move in when your knee is jammed to the floor with your opponent’s weight, or to turn in when your neck is twisted.
This is especially effective in grappling but applies to any stage of fighting. Most experienced martial artists will just move with you or stop trying to fight what can’t be won.
Know When You’re Winning and When You’re Losing
There are two important aspects to this principle, especially in grappling. First, know when you are in a better position and can relax. Second, understand who’s being taxed the most—this is even more important in wrestling.
When you’re in a favorable position, you’re ahead, meaning your opponent must respond, so you can relax. Wait for them to make a mistake, then capitalize.
The second aspect is about understanding who is under more demand. For example, if someone takes your back and tries to choke you, I’ll often let my opponent get to this position so they get excited and burn out their grip and biceps. When they fatigue, I respond. The fear response is also useful and can help end the fight immediately. Also, when grappling, if you use your muscles while I use my weight, joints, and angles, I’m in no rush—I know you’ll lose. The right response is to let go and move on.
Understand Which Part of Contact is Critical
When holding onto your opponent in Muay Thai, Judo, BJJ, or wrestling, certain grips, holds, and points of contact are most critical for control. Letting go of these without shifting to the next point allows your opponent to overthrow you immediately.
In clinching, this could be pulling someone’s head down. When catching a kick, it’s often the weight you put on the knee. In grappling, it’s pushing the knees away. In wrestling, it’s modulating the hips.
As mentioned, it’s wise to remain relaxed and soft until it’s time to attack, except for critical areas of control—if you soften there, you lose control. Always make sure that when you let go of one point of control, your next point is ready.
Use Violence Wisely
We’re all human, and we all care about personal safety. If you expect no violence and receive an unexpected attack, be prepared for retaliation from your opponent or bystanders. If violence is expected and you instead soften, confusion and uncertainty often follow, which can work in your favor.
During my time in the army, we often spoke of “rules of engagement.” In simple terms: if you attack me with a knife, I can use a knife; if you use fists, I cannot use weapons.
I understand you’re likely not in the army, nor are we at war, but it’s important not to be seen as the agitator, bully, or bad guy. Ignore this principle at your own peril.
Leave a Reply